10 Worst Family Movies of the 2000s, Ranked

The 2000s was a wild time for cinema. Developments in CGI resulted in additional extravagant and daring tales, and the success of The Lord of the Rings trilogy and the primary X-Males movie noticed a growth within the fantasy and superhero genres. On this planet of animation, Disney noticed main competitors from Pixar and DreamWorks, and 2D animation was phased out with CGI.

Sadly, not each movie that got here out this decade was a winner. Household films had been hit particularly exhausting by a string of unfunny comedies stuffed with low-brow humor and low-quality filmmaking that usually tried to ensnare viewers with celeb actors. These are the worst household films of the 2000s, dwelling as much as their status because the worst of the worst. This record will rank them based mostly on their high quality (or lack thereof), unhumorous plots, and mediocre performances.

10

‘House Alone 4’ (2002)

Directed by Rod Daniel

Kevin McCallister (Mike Weinberg) accepts the provide to spend Christmas along with his father, Peter (Jason Beghe) and his wealthy girlfriend, Natalie (Joanna Going), whereas they host some visiting royals at Natalie’s mansion. Thus, Kevin comes into battle along with his outdated enemy, Marv (French Stewart), and his spouse, Vera (Missi Pyle), who plan to kidnap the crown prince for ransom. Since his father does not consider him, Kevin finds methods to work round Natalie’s butler, Mr. Prescott (Erick Avari), to defend the home.

House Alone 4 is the proper instance of a movie that was made to money in on model recognition whereas having no respect for the franchise or the viewers. What’s the level of bringing again characters just like the McCallister household and Marv if they’re performed by completely different actors and act horribly out of character? Maybe if the movie was humorous, these adjustments could possibly be forgiven, however the jokes are simply the identical drained outdated slapstick that reinforces that the franchise ought to have ended with its wonderful first sequel.

House Alone 4: Taking Again the Home

Launch Date

November 3, 2002

Administrators

Rod Daniel

9

‘Shark Story’ (2004)

Directed by Vicky Jenson, Bibo Bergeron, and Rob Letterman

Oscar (Will Smith) is a bit of fish with huge ambitions of fame and fortune, however provided that he can repay the cash he owes his boss, Mr. Sykes (Martin Scorsese). When his crush, Angie (Renée Zellweger), sells a household heirloom to assist Oscar, he blows all of it in a horse race, so Sykes orders him killed. In the meantime, Don Lino’s (Robert De Niro) sons, Franky (Michael Imperioli) and Lenny (Jack Black), are out to show Lenny the way to kill so he may help run their father’s legal empire. An anchor finally ends up crushing Franky, and Oscar takes credit score for killing him, incomes him the love of his neighborhood however the hatred of Don Lino.

There are a lot of the reason why Shark Story is among the many worst films of 2004, however essentially the most evident is its most important character. Oscar is method too unlikable as a protagonist, and it is exhausting for audiences to sympathize with him when he involves resent his fame resulting from his earlier egocentric and inconsiderate actions. It additionally does not assist that the animation is ugly as sin, from the dirty aesthetic of the underwater world to the uncomfortably massive lips of the fish characters.

8

‘The Land Earlier than Time XIII: The Knowledge of Mates’ (2007)

Directed by Jamie Mitchell

When Grandma Longneck (Miriam Flynn) virtually dies in an earthquake, she comforts a distressed Littlefoot (Cody and Logan Arens) by explaining to him numerous life classes and good habits known as “Wisdoms.” Later, Littlefoot and his pals encounter a trio of yellow-bellied dinosaurs who’ve misplaced their method whereas migrating to Berry Vally. For the reason that Yellow Bellies are idiots, Littlefoot takes it upon himself to be their information and educate them in regards to the Wisdoms, however their goofy antics and quick consideration spans make each duties somewhat tough.

There’s a poetic irony that the worst sequel to The Land Earlier than Time is the thirteenth movie within the franchise. Whereas the unique 1988 film was darkish, mature, and did not discuss all the way down to children, The Land Earlier than Time XIII: The Knowledge of Mates is equal to animated junk meals that presents brilliant colours and foolish antics however nothing of worth. All of the movie’s issues could be traced again to the Yellow Bellies: their shrill voices waste the gifted Cuba Gooding Jr and Sandra Oh, whereas their idiotic antics and lack of self-preservation hurt the movie’s morale whereas continually placing the protagonists in hurt’s method.

The Land Earlier than Time XIII: The Knowledge of Mates

Launch Date

November 27, 2007

Runtime

76 minutes

7

‘Elf Bowling the Film: The Nice North Pole Elf Strike’ (2007)

Directed by David Kim and Rex Piano

After being thrown overboard by his pirate crew, Sanda Claus (Joe Alaskey) and his half-brother Dingle Kringle (Tom Kenny) someway arrive on the North Pole, the place they’re welcomed by elves who consider Santa is destined to be their chief. They grant the brothers immortality, however whereas Santa delivers toys to youngsters, Dingle lazes round for a number of hundred years till Santa tells him to get a spot of his personal. Dingle tries and usurp management over Christmas by difficult Santa to a recreation of Elf Bowling.

Elf Bowling the Film: The Nice North Pole Elf Strike takes a easy laptop recreation about Santa flattening putting elves like bowling pins and turns it right into a complicated mess of a movie. The animation is janky resulting from a mix of low textures and offputting movement seize, whereas the story pads itself out by replaying the identical story beats time and again. The movie can also be a musical, so audiences get handled to quite a few low-quality songs, together with one notably uncomfortable one the place Dingle sings in regards to the joys of slavery.

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6

‘Doogal’ (2005)

Directed by Dave Borthwick, Frank Passingham, and Jean Duval

When Dougal (Daniel Tay) unintentionally crashes right into a magic roundabout, he releases Zeebad (Jon Stewart), a jack-in-the-box wizard. Zeebad’s good counterpart, Zebedee (Sir Ian McKellen), explains that he’ll usher in a brand new ice age if he isn’t sealed away quickly. Dougal and his pals, Brian the snail (William H. Macy), Ermintrude the cow (Whoopi Goldberg), and Dylan the rabbit (Jimmy Fallon), should deliver collectively three magic diamonds earlier than Zeebad can use them to work his icy magic.

Initially titled The Magic Roundabout in Europe, Doogal is what occurs when localizers go too far. The unique story is buried beneath a relentless barrage of popular culture references and bathroom humor as if it fears dropping the viewers’s consideration if it provides them a second of respite. Whereas the European model is seen as a good sufficient movie, the American dub has been lambasted as one of many worst animated movies of the 2000s.

Doogal just isn’t out there to stream or buy within the US and Canada.

5

‘Rapsittie Avenue Youngsters: Imagine in Santa’ (2002)

Directed by Colin Slater

As Christmas attracts close to, the youngsters of Rapsittie Avenue can not help however speculate about what presents they will obtain. Ricky (Walter Emanuel Jones), a younger boy dwelling along with his great-grandmother (Debra Wilson), decides to offer his beloved teddy bear, gifted to him by his mom, to native golden scholar and materialist Nicole (Paige O’Hara). She initially rejects the bear and throws it away, however after studying how essential it’s to Ricky, she enlists a few of her classmates to assist discover it.

Rapsittie Avenue Youngsters: Imagine in Santa is so abysmal that it transcends to turn into a so-bad-it’s-good vacation trainwreck. The animation is atrocious, with stiff actions, unfinished fashions, and characters who stroll by sliding throughout the display screen as a result of their ft by no means correctly contact the bottom. In the meantime, the story is as predictable as they arrive for a Christmas particular and even features a subplot a couple of woman named Lenee (Jodi Benson) doubting her religion in Santa. The most effective that may be mentioned is that the particular someway rounded up among the finest names in voice appearing, together with Mark Hamill and Nancy Cartwright, so no less than the offputting characters sound good.

Rapsittie Avenue Youngsters: Imagine in Santa just isn’t out there to stream or buy within the US and Canada,

4

‘The Cat within the Hat’ (2003)

Directed by Bo Welch

Conrad (Spencer Breslin) and Sally Walden (Dakota Fanning) torture their overworked mom, Joan (Kelly Preston), by being a troublemaker and management freak, respectively. In the future, as the children are caught inside through the rain, an anthropomorphic speaking cat known as the Cat within the Hat (Mike Myers) reveals as much as educate the children to have enjoyable. Nonetheless, his classes trigger mass destruction and entice the eye of the neighbor, Larry (Alec Baldwin), who hopes to marry Joan and ship Conrad to navy faculty.

The Cat within the Hat is the worst Dr. Seuss movie, making his widow, Audrey Geisel, prohibit future live-action variations of her husband’s work. Not like Jim Carry from How the Grinch Stole Christmas, who merged along with his costume to ship an outstanding efficiency, Myers feels awkward and stiff because the Cat within the Hat. This strategy is at odds with the character’s eccentric and fun-loving nature and makes him come throughout as creepy. Past Myers’ efficiency, the movie is mean-spirited and stuffed to the brim with out-of-place sexual innuendos.

The Cat within the Hat

Launch Date

November 21, 2003

Runtime

82 Minutes

3

‘The Grasp of Disguise’ (2002)

Directed by Perry Andelin Blake

When Pistachio’s (Dana Carvey) dad and mom are kidnapped by grasp legal Devlin Bowman (Brent Spiner), his grandfather reveals that their household is masters of disguise who use their expertise for mimicry to interrupt up legal empires. If Pistachio is to rescue his dad and mom, who’re being compelled to steal artifacts for Bowman, he should grasp this reward as shortly as potential. He additionally hires an assistant, Jennifer Baker (Jennifer Esposito), who he topics to questionable and outright problematic feedback.

Roger Ebert summed up The Grasp of Disguise completely in his written evaluation, “The film is sort of a occasion visitor who thinks he’s humorous and is mistaken.” It retains repeating the identical jokes time and again: Jennifer has a small butt, Bowman farts on a regular basis, and Pistachio says “turtle” repeatedly when attempting to get into the Turtle Membership, as if it thinks repeating the joke one million instances will instantly make it humorous. You would possibly suppose that the movie is no less than mercifully quick, however no, they pad out the credit with outtakes and deleted scenes.

2

‘Son of the Masks’ (2005)

Directed by Lawrence Guterman

When cartoonist Tim Avery’s (Jamie Kennedy) canine, Otis (Invoice Farmer and Richard Steven Horvitz), comes residence with a inexperienced masks, he wears it for a Halloween occasion and is reworked right into a dwelling cartoon character who can warp actuality round himself. Earlier than taking the masks off, he will get his spouse pregnant, and the newborn inherits the masks’s powers. As Tim tries to be a superb father to his son, Otis will get jealous and tries to make use of the masks to kill the newborn. Oh, and the Norse God Loki (Alan Cummings) is searching for the masks on the orders of Odin (Bob Hoskins).

Son of the Masks is like being trapped in a waking nightmare. Extra traumatizing than entertaining, the movie makes use of CGI to squash, stretch, and exaggerate its characters like they’re in a Tex Avery cartoon, however what’s hilarious and charming when finished to a 2D character comes throughout as horrific on a human, not to mention a younger child. What’s worse is that these demonic photographs bombard the display screen in rapid-fire succession, which means that your mind does not even have time to course of every horror earlier than being assaulted by the following.

1

‘Superbabies: Child Geniuses 2’ (2004)

Directed by Bob Clark

4 infants who maintain their intelligence hidden from adults share the story of Kahuna (Leo, Gerry, and Myles Fitzgerald/David A. Kaye), a brilliant child who does not age and goes around the globe rescuing children in want. Positive sufficient, Kahuna arrives of their city in pursuit of his rival, Invoice Biscane (Jon Voight), who has evil plans to hypnotize individuals via his new tv community. To cease him, Kahuna takes the 4 infants to his secret lair and helps them unlock their superpowers.

The unique Child Geniuses was panned for its ridiculous premise and horrible particular results used to make the infants discuss, however Superbabies: Child Geniuses 2 someway takes all the things dangerous in regards to the first movie and makes it worse. This movie has no target market: children cannot get sucked into the ability fantasy of defeating evil adults as a result of the protagonists are infants, and older audiences cannot get invested within the plot as a result of it is a paper-thin excuse to have a bunch of jokes that revolve round infants. It is the cinematic equal to antimatter, destroying all the things it comes into contact with, greater than incomes its 0% rating on Rotten Tomatoes.

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NEXT: The ten Finest Films That Outlined the 2000s, Ranked