Czech mannequin Paulina Porizkova has revealed she needed to die after her ex-husband Ric Ocasek died unexpectedly in 2019.
Ocasek was one of many lead vocalists within the band the Vehicles and died on September 15 that yr. Ocasek’s loss of life occurred two weeks after he’d undergone surgical procedure, although Porizkova later claimed the surgical procedure was not the explanation for his loss of life.
Now the mannequin, 57, has opened up about what grieving her husband was actually like in an interview with Web page Six.
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”It is not even a lot that I considered how you can kill myself or when to kill myself – it was simply that feeling of, ‘I simply do not know how you can go on. I can not do that anymore. … I simply need to go away. I can not bear waking up tomorrow morning, being the identical individual with the identical emotions. I can not carry it anymore,'” she stated.
She added, “I imply, how many individuals would not [think about it], you realize?”
Porizkova and Ocasek had a difficult relationship previous to his loss of life, having simply separated a yr earlier.
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The pair had been married for 28 years and shared two kids, Jonathan, now 29, and Oliver, now 24, after they determined to separate in 2018.
However on the time of Ocasek’s loss of life, the complete household was nonetheless dwelling collectively.
It got here as a large blow then, when Porizkova found as they have been organising her ex-husband’s funeral, that he’d reduce her out of his will.
“I’ve made no provision for my spouse Paulina Porizkova… as we’re within the strategy of divorcing,” the rocker wrote in his final needs.
“Even when I ought to die earlier than our divorce is remaining… Paulina just isn’t entitled to any elective share… as a result of she has deserted me.”
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Within the interview, which promotes Porizkova’s new assortment of essays, No Filter: The Good, the Unhealthy, and the Stunning, Porizkova revealed the harm that got here from that discovery, calling it a “betrayal”.
“It was actually, actually laborious as a result of clearly, initially, you are grieving an individual that has been your complete life, an important individual in your life…” she stated.
“There was a lot ache simply stacked up on high of one another… after which this betrayal was rather a lot.”
For those who or anybody you realize wants fast help, contact Lifeline on 13 11 14 or through lifeline.org.au. In an emergency, name 000.
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